well, i'd dropped off the face of the earth for a minute here, but I was hanging on with all my positivity to the fact that things always happen for a reason, and everything happens exactly the way it should! ;)
I am currently confined to my teeny little cabin all alone, recovering from a very icky bout of not being well... Started feeling rundown on Wednesday morning and I thought it was the flu as one of the other fitness instructors here had been signed off two sea days in the last two weeks, but on Wednesday night after dinner I started being queasy. Thought it was dinner but long story short it was some sort of gastro and I have been signed off for a minimum of 48 hours so as not to pass around my bugs... icky!!!
I feel so excited to be back on board Liberty now, after my hiccup with Jerome, I am determined to stay here and finish out this contract with a bang!!! Gotta inspire people to get their lives in the right place... Come on everyone, Nutrition, Exercise and Detox is the way forward!!! Start now and start somewhere!
Since I became vegan on vacation, I have now lost 10kg back to my long sought after weight of 55kg! Woohoo.. Cardio & Strength fitness needs a bit of an improvement, but I am adding my personal training back in now too, fitting it around the gym hours etc...
Anyway - I guess I better write an update here for my loving friends who are wondering what the hell is going on with this man of mine... Well, I guess that's where we start, he's not my man anymore. We are friends and I think it is best this way, though it hurts and I miss our relationship, he doesn't really love me and I cannot force him too.. He loves me (and it's his words i'll use) like a sister, but that's not what I'm looking for... I am looking for a partner who loves me unconditionally, who is physically attracted to me, who wants to touch me and be with me, but also wants to give me my space to be me. Jerome will give me my space, but he just doesn't have that attraction to me. I can see it and feel it and it leaves me feeling hollow inside as he doesn't realise just how far apart we have grown... Either way,I think I can find what I am looking for at home, but I am in no rush right now, I don't want to go from one person to another, I want to look after me, learn to be stronger alone and then when I am least looking for it - I think I will find my love...
Anyway I have many amazing friends in Australia who I can spend time with and share fun and BBQ's and laughter and yoga, and training, growing and life with and I saw so many of them this last vacation and I am missing them terribly already...
Witch, Vicky, Bwandy, Jeffrey, Judy, Michelle, Chris, and all the rest you make my world at home special and I love you all... I will be home at the end of this contract and I expect to be seeing a tonne of you all!!!
In the mean time, I better train, focus, make some money, inspire some people, do as much yoga and scrapping as I can and be true to myself. It is hard to do here I have discovered as I take onboard other peoples feelings and make myself all worried and worked up, being alone in my cabin this two days has made me realise, I can only look after one person here, that is me, then once I have taken care of number one, I can give my best to others...
So wish me luck, start those emails and messages again (can't log on to facebook at the moment not sure why but will keep trying so don't be sad if I am slow to reply there - email is fastest ms_zane@ii.net)... Why not send me a message telling me how you are doing cos I really do want to know...
QUOTE:
When asked what gift he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied: "I wish no gifts, only presence." ~Author Unknown
and
Before you've practiced, the theory is useless. After you've practiced, the theory is obvious. ~David Williams, an Ashtanga yoga teacher in Maui, Hawaii, quoted from yoga.com Love and hugs
Zane xoxox
